Frathouse Washrooms and Confessions to My Sister

Dreams 04.28.13

I was watching some old Stephen Chow movies yesterday afternoon and I think it jogged memories of times in my early teens when I used to do marathon viewings with my god brother, whom I used to have the biggest teenage crush on. I dreamt that there was a small family gathering.  Only the “young” ones were there.  I couldn’t tell if I was my age now or if the clock had somehow dialed back 15 years.  Anyway, the young’uns were all gathered in the basement in a small area, with some couches.  The walls were all plain white. Here and there were a few spot lights where the white of the walls was really “hot”, blindingly bright.  I really can’t remember much of what happened with my god brother now. Maybe I tried to seduce him in a an awkward and unsuccessful way?

What I do remember is going into a very tight women’s bathroom with several stalls. There were basically at least 2 women and a man per stall.  The women were taking turns giving the men blowjobs or other sexual favours. I wondered for a second if I had somehow stumbled inside a frat house? The women and men did look young.  I just wasn’t sure if I fit in. I didn’t have a problem with what everyone was doing, it looked like it was all in good fun but I just remember feeling awkward because I really did need to just use the bathroom and all the stalls were filled. There may have been more to this dream but I forget.

I woke up around 8am this morning then fell asleep again to this next dream:

I was sitting in the audience of a charity event.  The audience area was just a bunch of aluminum chairs setup on a raise platform.  We were directly facing the stage or where the action was.  We were situated indoors but the whole side of the room was open to the outside.  There was a narrow alleyway where the “action” was occuring.  Diagonally from our open wall, was another similar room, where there was a stage erected.  Anyways I think it was a race or a marathon and the runners would’ve passed through the alleyway and meanwhile there was entertainment on the stage for spectators.

I believe I was with my mother and my sister. Whatever was happening on stage did not interest me.  I was just there to support my mom for her charitable contributions and for emotional support when she would be asked to speak on stage.  Then I heard the announcement calling for her but when I looked to her seat, she was no where to be found. Someone from across the alleyway, jumped down and crossed over to our side. They started asking me where my mom went? They kept pressuring me. So I said I have no idea.  Then my sister urged me to go speak in her place and of course I did not want to but the pressure from everyone around me now made it hard to refuse.  So I sheepishly followed the man who had jumped across to our side, over to the stage area.

Then I had a glimpse of a close-up of a Facebook page. On somebody’s timeline from 5-6 years ago, they made a comment of thanking me for teaching them how to do something at the television station.  Then jump down to the timeline for now and it said something like, “failed at everything” (in reference to me, what I was about to do on that stage). Then it all happened in a blur that I’m not sure what actually happened.  I found myself walking fast, away from the stage, the event, my sister following closely behind me.  We were weaving through alleyways through this market-like area.  Finally I passed by a couple of pubs that seemed familiar (from my London trip) and I said to my sister, “Let’s go get a drink.” She was surprised and somewhat reluctant. We’ve NEVER just gone to have a drink before. I don’t even think I’ve ever had a drink with her.

There were 3 pubs open here, one was a bit more posh, one more casual with nothing but the bar and seats, just walk up and order a pint type of place and the last was a gastropub with table service for food orders. I briefly thought about which would be best to take my sister into but then just walked right into the casual place. She hesitantly followed me in. I walked up to the bar, ordered a pint for each of us and shoved one in her hand. My sister seemed fidgety, not quite sure how to act in these surroundings. Then I told her my plans to leave my marriage. She like everyone else might, asked logically why I am still in it now, why not just take off and go. I told her how there would be quite a few months before anything could be done. I may even have explained all the details (don’t know really). I don’t remember what she said. She might’ve asked a questions but for the most part she just listened which is quite rare for my sister. Plus she didn’t really seem surprised at all.

I’m not sure if I actually felt a big weight lifted from me after telling her. I feel like after I had told her, I kind of floated out of my body into camera mode, drifting away from the bar, from a shot looking at the two of us, then out the windows and up above the pub, overlooking the street and surrounding areas.

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