Bawling to Wakefulness

Dreams 02.21.14
I had a conversation with husband about finances. (The real life talk is planned for this Sunday so I am definitely anxious about it*) In the dream, it did not go well at all. I asked for less than I think is probably fair already, I can’t remember the number but below what I think I will be asking for IRL. I expected resistance but not this. He started yelling at me, telling me I was a gold digger, how I am kicking him when he is down, etc. It was terrible. I woke up or rather drifted out of the dream bawling. I’m not sure if I was tearing up or not but I definitely cried.

Then I drifted back into sleep hoping very hard not to keep thinking about the previous dream. I dreamt of more fantastical things. One particular dream involved me going to a wedding or formal dressed event. My mother was supposed to drive. She had a convertible. I jumped into her car and it was a beautiful day. We took a turn onto a highway. There was a big sign that said it was under construction. When we got on the highway, I saw that it was reeeally unfinished. Lanes were not marked, the asphalt was a beautiful black. Some edges did not have barriers around the curves.

But the sky, it was an unreal clear blue and the surrounding scenery was rolling green hills that made for a perfect backdrop to the drive. My mother was driving but somehow I felt like I had control of the car too. We enjoyed going down the highway, wind in our hair, sun on our faces so much that we were definitely going too fast. Then we tossed the car around a curve with no barrier and the car soon off and began to fall.

I was out of my body looking down at the car and what was below the drop. It was the ocean. It was pixely like looking down from a bird’s eye view of a Minecraft world. Blocks of islands and cliffs then blocks of water.

I felt the sensation of falling slowed and I drifted back into my body in the car and continued falling.

* The real talk didn’t end up happening. Rescheduled to this coming weekend. Wish me luck.


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