Wolves, Caves and Bright White Fog

Dream 05.16.12

I just arrived at a newly renovated old victorian style home with several other people, my crew. A little girl of 7 or 8 greeted us at the entrance, just in front of the stairs. She was plainly dressed in pale colored clothing. She took us on a tour of the house and we followed her everywhere.

We were in a place that was definitely underground, probably the basement except it was cave-like and there was snow, rock formations and ice. It was dark and dank. We were on one side of a rock formation that had two “outer” sides that rejoined on the other end from us. It had very thin narrow edges with a big snowy gap in the middle. The girl nimbly walked across one edge to the other side. She turned and just looked back at us, waiting. The male leader of our crew started on one ledge. He was tall with big feet and shoes. I started through the snowy middle and from my vantage point beneath him, I saw him very carefully shuffle along because he feet were much bigger than the ledge under them. He toes were overhanging the edge and I could see the soles of the shoes. I want to note that I didn’t recognize the male leader but I kept thinking of him like the douchey hosts of those ghost hunter shows.

Then suddenly I felt something crunch beneath my feet as I waded through the snowy middle, chest deep. Ice! Luckily the snow acted as a float to keep me from falling straight through the cracked ice. The male leader, although he was having a hard time not falling himself, reached out with both of his long arms towards me, I grabbed them and with the leverage of his heels against the ledge and his back against the rocks behind him, I was yanked right out of the snow onto the ledge beside him. I could see the girl smile even though I never glanced at her. Once on the ledge, it was easy for me and my small feet. So I walked across holding the leader’s hand to keep him balanced.

Wheb the whole crew reached the other side the girl waited for us in front of another set of stairs. These looked like they led back upstairs where a dim light could be seen. All surrounding the stairs, it was dark. We all approached the girl and when I was about a foot away, I see glowing eyes and a furried canine face jump at me. I hurled the wolf to the ground. The male leader of our crew pushed a camcorder in my hand telling me to document it as he wrestled the animal on the floor. When I had the camera ready, monitor panel flipped out, all framed up, the attacking wolf was gone.

We were startled, checked each other with quick glances to make sure everyone was okay. Then I looked over to check the little girl. Behind her sitting on the third step of the stairs was another wolf. It had bright white fur on its chest and face with black and grey fur everywhere else. This one just sat their looking at us calmly but still gaging our every move.

Then we were back upstairs at the entrance. The girl started to explain to us about everything that happened, how it was part of an old children’s book. She quoted something from it, I can’t quite remember. It was something about a pale girl, darkness and anxiety. It wasn’t really like that but that’s the feeling her quote provoked anyway.

Afterwards, I exited the house and was in a wide school hallway with lockers on both sides. I felt like I was riding on a bicycle, gliding forwards. Then everything around me became bright white as if I was gliding through fog. I could see indistinct sentences and equations floating faintly in mid-air. As I glided past them they floated upwards and faded to nothing. I was seeking something as I moved forward, trying to come out of the fog. If I only I found my way out I would have what I needed.

I could not tell if I was getting closer or not but there was a hopeful feeling to just keep on through the white fog. Then the alarm woke me up. For a little while when I closed my eyes again I could still see the white fog vision but it gradually faded away and I woke up to reality.

The Dinky Gym and a Session With Friends

Although this account seems detailed, I have a feeling there was much more lost to my memory. As I theorized a couple days ago (perhaps this is widely known), my natural hormonal cycle is probably affecting my memory. It has gotten a lot better the past 2 days for dream recall but there is still a general feeling of forgetfulness and lack of focus.

Dream 05.10.12
I get a day pass at a dinky little day spa / gym for women. When you go in, it looks more like a hair salon. I spoke to the girls at the front desk, she gives me a little token as my pass. I change and ask her where the free weights are. She points me to the back of the room. I don’t even see it and it turns out it’s one tower of weights, covered accidentally by another towel. The weights on it were small and the increments were not regular. I think the next up from a 5lb was 9lb. They also didn’t have the traditional dumbbell shape. The 9 lbs were like s straight pink banana.

Then a class must’ve broke because suddenly it was busy all around. So much so that I couldn’t even do any exercises in the back corner because I was bumping into other people. All the ladies around were either moving onto their next exercise, or changing. I got annoyed and thought, “where the hell is the changeroom? Why don’t they go there? Or I’ll go THERE to work out.” When I found it, it was small with on one bench, surrounded by about 10-12 lockers and it was jam-packed.

I go back out to the main area not sure what to do. Then a woman waves me over at reception. It was the owner. She reassures me that it just gets like this when a class let’s out, it’ll be over soon. Then she invited me into another area of the building to work out. She also told the receptionist to give me a free pair of slippers which I took and remember that I thought them to be very nice quality and that putting them on would indeed feel luxurious.

We go to a back room where the ceilings open up. It looks like a living room, there’s a tv, a coffee table and a couch. The design is all very straight-edged and minimalist with lots of sunlight coming from somewhere. I was guessing that the owner must live here. She gestured to the floor rug underneath our feet and said I was free to use the space as I wished. Then she walked away, back through the door to the gym. I looked around and was satisfied enough. So I changed right there in the living room back into my exercise clothes, feeling the cool air against my bare skin as I did, becoming a little goosebumpy. I can’t recall if I actually worked out after that.

Then a bunch of friends and I are sitting at a long table. The design of this room seemed to match with the gym owner’s house but that is uncertain. Anyway, we were all sitting there with lots of snacks on the table, games and several bongs. There was also a small tv on my end. I believe husband was on my right but I never talked to him or saw his face. The table was full. Df had arrived with someone else’s brother and they settled in standing behind me, sorta to my left. We were all in communal conversation, I was listening and laughing. Df did not say something to me directly but out of the corner of my eye, he gestured some joke to me and I just laughed a really good hearty laugh. I felt really good, happy, high and carefree with friends just enjoying the wasting of time.

Then people wanted to take a break from the table and go out to backyard. I look outside while people were going out, it looked wintery, chilly and windy. It was a big long yard with some shrubs in the distance but everything was covered in a blanket of snow. Since I was still in my exercise clothes, I didn’t really want to go. I think I did anyways in the end, with a thick jacket around me.

Dream or Revelations?

Over the past couple weeks I have been making progress in my daily dream recall with the ultimate goal to become lucid. Apart from wanting to try certain activities while lucid, I was also hoping this journey into the dream world would allow me some much needed conversation with my subconscious.

I’ve been struggling with certain conflicts between my heart, body and mind for quite a long time now. It seems to have been a never ending struggle in the past 8 years where I often doubted if the final outcome was what I actually chose. Or perhaps my mind told me the logical steps to take even though my heart and body told me otherwise. Usually my heart has been caught somewhere in the middle and ultimately the mind won the battle.

Now, I am at a point where it seems the heart and body are mostly on one side but my mind is standing strong, trying to tug my heart to its side. Now more than ever, I feel the need to listen to my subconscious, who has perhaps known the truth all along but my mind just shielded me from it. Perhaps because the real truth would hurt, a lot.

Anyways, I will start logging what I recall from my dreams here. Here is a first entry for last night’s 2 dreams.

Dream 1:
My dear friend drives me to a bus stop located on the side of a deserted parking lot. It is late at night, only a few street lamps are on. It is windy, cold and snowy.

My husband appears at the bus stop. My friend sees that I am “safe” and drives off into the night. My husband asks me when the bus is arriving. I check the schedule and it says 11:20pm but I knew it was never going to come. He asks me a few more times and I repeat the time the bus should arrive. We just wait in the cold, standing a couple feet apart from each other.

Dream 2:
I am on a brand new luxury coach bus. My dear friend, roommate and Ginger are all on the bus but sitting separately. The bus is full of people. Everyone on the bus is going to Ginger’s house. Apparently his family is hosting some gathering.

We arrive outside the destination and Ginger tries to get off the bus first to lead the way. He is pissed drunk, slurring and stumbling his way out of the bus, tripping at times as he passes the seats.

When we are off the bus, we are somehow immediately inside. It’s supposed to be his family’s house (but not like the one irl), this one is huge. There are a lot of people here, much more than I had expected. I knew no one besides my dear friend and roommate.

We make our way to where food was supposed being served and encounter a super long line up into the basement where a huge buffet of sorts was setup. But there were so many people, the line moved slowly. We waited in line anyway just hanging out.

That’s all I remember from this dream.